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Showing posts from 2015

Write-to-write, a start.

I've kept many diaries; some of them were gorgeously wrapped things, all of them were purchased or procured in a near-fevered fashion, for I was certain that having the right tool would naturally lead to getting the right words down. The impulse was there, always. But it was clouded, because any words I wrote down were always with some unknown reader in mind, some fantasy other who marveled at my wit, or creativity, or candor. None of these books were filled, to my memory. Quarter-filled notebooks full of overmediated yuck. I remember a self who used to love to write, but I can't actually seem to access that self - so I wonder if that was a bit of a fiction, too. Or perhaps the retelling has muddied things. Anyway. I'm going to try to write to write, not write to be read. I mean, the ultimate goal is to be read, of course, but I think I need to practice the messaging-as-such. The writerly is one of the ways that I need to connect, so feeling so very disconnected from th